Last time I blogged, was at the end of my spring semester here, and man oh man, what craziness has followed ever since, thank God he gave me a heart for adventure!
Life is full of miracles, blessings, surprises, and amazing-ness - every day - maybe I should write more often
First of all, while every month of the year seems to offer its crazy challenges, God has been so faithful, I really can't argue trusting Him, there really is no point, because every time I have tried to be in control, He's proved to me that only HE knows what is best for me. Silly humans, who do we think we are. He's outside of time, sees and knows everything, why do we insist in taking control from him?
Here's an awesome example of how cool it is to let God guide our lives:
So, I met someone. An amazing man of God who challenges me, excites me, loves me, spoils me, inspires me, encourages me, and is the most genuine and loving person I know. I love everything about him, his human-ness, his heart, his passions, goals, his past and his present. But the most attractive thing about him (besides his amazing blue eyes and adorable dimples) is the way he loves the Lord. As I look back to the short time we've been together, I am completely amazed and astounded by this very unexpected blessing. It is so surreal. Yet the coolest thing about this relationship is how real it truly is. We each have our own problems, pasts, and fears. We are so different. We frustrate each other at times and have had our hard times already. Yet there is this natural reaction to run to God together, and to confront all these things. I love it. Because it is not us, it is God, teaching us and molding us.
This is one of the most exciting adventures God has ever taken me on, and it is only the beginning. And yes, I think it is a very appropriate time for everyone to know, that I love Ryan Ward.
Another thing that I've come to realize recently is how amazing it is to truly live out church the way God calls us to. Every blessing I have received in my life has been the result of people that live this calling out. My parents and their amazing love. My super awesome brother and sister. The people that have become my family here (specifically every single person at house-church, my love and his awesome family, and Kels and her wonderful family), all the families that trust me to take care of their kids, friends from our Thursday night Bible study, and even people that don't know me but still have decided to bless me. "Thank you" doesn't do justice to how grateful I am for every single one of you and what you have done for me, and I truly want to apologize because I know sometimes I don't articulate my gratefulness. Your selflessness and generosity inspires and encourages me to do the same for others. Which brings me to my last musing for the night:
This is a broken world. Every day I am more aware of it. There is so much pain and hopelessness, and so many people live this life by just going through the motions. I have come to realize that I would rather feel so much that it hurts, than to be numb. Its hard to say it sometimes, and it would be easier to ignore it, because this decision asks much. It asks to do something about the brokenness. However, I'm a believer of living this life with a purpose, and while I most definitely don't have it figured out, I feel I am ruined for the ordinary. Its no secret I don't want a normal life, so might as well make it worth while and invest it in people, share the hope I have been given in Christ and the joy that comes from that, and to use my talents and passions for others and with a goal that, right now is beyond my understanding, but which faith makes evident. To bless how I have been blessed.
There is no other way I would want to live this life.
